CONFESSIONS OF A VEGETARIAN: The Day I Heard A Fish Cry

Born into an American home with a pre-set diet, I had trouble eating what people call “meat.” Something did not agree with me. I preferred cooked spinach.

Sunday food with my beloved grandparents was a mixed blessing: corn on the cob, tomatoes, potato salad or mashed potatoes, green beans, watermelon, custard pies and peach cobbler. That, and being with my grandparents, was delightful. How the chicken became part of Sunday best, I don’t really want to know. I was in conflict. I wanted to eat what my grandparents had prepared. Another part of me recoiled from the fried stuff. I struggled with eating all through college.

Friends and I canoed while in college and after. One of my friends fished and one afternoon invited us to learn. Reluctantly, I agreed. What I was seeking in our time away was peaceful meanderings around the lake, “gunnelling,” (a favorite childhood activity), great campfires and conversations. The fact that we were going fishing for a weekend did not register.

At the end of the first day, my friend was happy to have caught a lot of fish. I experienced regret. I remember little except having a wiggling fish placed into my hands from the pail. I felt its pain and then its life leaving its body. I recall little else. Did I do as instructed? Did I cook, eat? I don’t know.

I did run far into the woods and burst into tears. I felt again this life hurting and dying; I cried and cried and cried.  Hours later, my friends kept calling me as dusk became dark.

Something in the woods spoke to me of connection, of our time upon earth carrying our footsteps. I walked back, dazed. I wish I could say I never ate of another being’s life again. But process isn’t like that. Nor are inner conflicts. At least, not mine.

Eventually, I was guided by wisdom. These same friends and I embarked on a six-month road trip together starting at the Rio Grande and working our way west and then north.  We ate sparingly. What we ate went underground in my consciousness. I do remember the joy of berry picking in Oregon, boiling and canning them.

Eventually two of us left the road to live in a San Francisco communal home with an old college friend. There were fresh community veggie food co-ops. Eating flesh was passé. Peaches, strawberries, fresh greens, salads, rice, beans and chocolate were the norm.

I wish I had completed my conflict there. I didn’t. But that year was an interlude into living my core values, really deepening what had I had learned in college. That education is of value when woven into and instructed by the world in which we live, its times, and its call for change. Give it tribute, connect with it, and you will be taught what you are here to learn. Ignore it and you succumb to the blind numbness of habits and values not yours...old torn hand-me-downs in need of revival. In my next blog, I continue CONFESSIONS OF A VEGETARIAN. One big fish story is enough for today.

So dear reader, when did you have a defining moment that led to transformation out of conflict?

CHOOSING TO LIVE AND LET LIVE

Killing, as a solution, comes easy to this culture. We seem to reach for it first.

Is there a problem we haven't tried to solve by wiping it off the face of the earth? Pesticides, herbicides, war, antibiotics [suicide, homicide, genocide, euthanasia]-other options considered only if eradication doesn't work, which it usually doesn't, at least not in the long run.

                                                                            Priscilla Stuckey, Kissed By A Fox

When I read Priscilla’s book, I came to a sentence that rocked my soul. “Killing, as a solution, comes easy to this culture.” As a systems thinker, I’ve been in reflection. Many actions are shaped by cultural beliefs and myths handled down that we unwittingly perpetuate. Waking up to this reality startled me. It’s amazing to uncover systems contributing to a collective anesthetization that defends killing as solution.

We will never find positive solutions when aligned with myths and practices that ennoble killing, or unnatural dying and suffering. Albert Einstein is right: “We can’t solve problems by using the same mind that created them.” Consider two beliefs conditioning us in matters of killing, from two people who went beyond tradition.

Death or Life 1:

·       The first people canonized as saints were done so because they were martyrs. By being a martyr they were proving their faith. To die for one’s religious beliefs was considered noble.

What does this canonization criteria mean for aspirants wanting to make a difference? Do we need to be killed, die unnaturally or suffer? Is this tacit validation for “holy” wars?

·       Saint Hildegard lived a long life, dying of natural causes. She denounced the practice of self-flagellation and was a composer, Prioress and holistic practitioner.

Rev. Amy Freedman celebrated her life in saying: “Even Naturalists can appreciate her mystical insight long before atoms were discovered, that there is a divine energy animating every person, creature, and plant.” Does Hildegard’s life inspire you in making a difference?

Death or Life 2:

·       One slow dying belief: “animal experiments are vital to the advancement of medicine and science.”

What does this belief suggest? That life is expendable? When we believe we are saving life by the taking of life, what do we lose? Do we lose our integrity and faith in “no harm” solutions?

·       Jane Goodall, Scientist and “Messenger of Peace” thinks so: "By and large students are taught that it is ethically acceptable to perpetrate, in the name of science, what from the point of view of the animals would certainly qualify as torture. By the time [the students] arrive in the labs they have been programmed to accept the suffering around them."

Jane Goodall named the chimpanzees that she studied. She upended long-conditioned beliefs about efficacious research. She changed science. She shines her light for the pathway of “no harm” solutions. Does she motivate you?

What choices did you make reaching for wrong solutions? What solutions have you discovered that honor ALL life?

DO WE EVER TIRE OF THE SIXTIES?

A final SNCC legacy is the destruction of the psychological shackles which had kept black southerners in physical and mental peonage; SNCC helped break those chains forever. It demonstrated that ordinary women and men, young and old, could perform extraordinary tasks.

                                                                                             Julian Bond

In my last blog, I mentioned the all-intrepid “sixties”.
http://consultingforpassion.blogspot.com/2014/04/its-time-for-what-to-do-it-all-or-to_25.html The sixties are a good marker for what’s possible. It was a fundamental moment when life mattered and investment in a future counted for something. It shaped a global “conversation”. In organizational development, we call that shaping a new organizational culture.

Folks were tired of inequality, injustice, dogma; the US going to war, and promises made but not kept. Universities were hotbeds of change. Students were through with hypocrisy. They wanted values built on living out noble truths.

I asked a friend, a high profile University administrator, what was her best career accomplishment? “I left my job to travel down south in support of Martin Luther King’s initiatives.” I was inspired. Such are the affirmations that change cultures.

“The Sixties” was a meeting point of collaborative ventures. It was a time of great integrity. Rosa Parks refused to move to the back of the bus. Other Afro-Americans sat down in what once were “white people only” diners and requested to purchase a cup of coffee. Martin Luther King studied Gandhi’s ahimsa model and implemented an American non-violent protest movement.

“I have a dream” is at the heart of any good organizational development work.  Finding that dream, laying down the values, and creating the culture that supports that dream being realized is how change occurs. Martin Luther King inspired a nation and generated an organizational design for a hopeful future. Ask anyone who was active during that time and they will tell you: it changed their lives.

Well, guess what? It’s still “The Sixties.” We’re still working for equality for all women, children, races, cultures and economic groups. And then there’s Mother Earth and ALL her children. Alice Walker was asked about the future she wanted. “I want a world of peace and happiness and joy and plenty of food and water for everyone. That’s what I want for everyone, men and women, animals and trees.” Today, I received an email from a friend who is working on an initiative to save the wolves.  My heart lightened. Every shift in our shared culture initiatives empowers us all.

Every organization I know needs organizational development. In the sixties, we were on fire to develop our leadership, that of institutions, and of a nation. We asked ourselves the hard questions. We sought mentors. We became teachers. We evolved equitable partnerships. We set the bar high.

What would thrill me? I want all organizations to step up and request organizational development, inclusive of stakeholders, CEO’s to frontlines. People and animals deserve it. The environment needs it. So do the organizations!

Our world is waiting. What organizational change will you initiate, dear reader?

BELLISSIMA: READY TO ROCK YOUR SOUL?

We are constantly being asked to turn our faces away from our own internal images of what is right, true and most of all alive for us. The very simplicity of these images may seem to speak against them. We give them away thinking they cannot be reflected by the complex experience of the world in which we have learned to live. But giving them away, we find ourselves strangely empty. Finally, we understand that though the world will never be simple, a life that honors the soul seems to have a kind of radical simplicity at the center of it.
                                                                        David Whyte

No twerking or other vulgarity, no sexy clothes, not even any makeup. Talent and enthusiasm is all this 25-year old nun needs to do to bring a heavily tattooed man to tears, and elicit acclaim from everyone in the studio. Brava!!! Bellissima!    
                                                                       Molly Alexander Darden, Huffpost Blogger

I have a gift and have come to give it to you. Shouldn’t things be that way?
                                                                        Sister Cristina Scuccia

How many of you know that you have something to say and hold it back? Recently THE VOICE has been in my space. First in my own inquiry: How can I give inspired voice to my work and life? More visibility? If living an authentic life, what is my most important decision this moment? What gives it voice? I keep choosing what my heart yearns to hear and needs to express. Amazing.

As I am finding new voice, I receive a happy email from a friend. Did I hear the news of who recently was on the television show, “The Voice”? I had not. Isn’t it fun how the media, instant and accessible, lets us celebrate all the new voices getting out here into our world? Even the relatives of a good friend.

Also recently, another friend and I were knee deep in coaching. When I coached him, I heard my voice come from this deeper place. He realized from this call that his new project was life altering. When he coached me, his integrity flashed across the phone like a laser. “David Whyte’s radical simplicity might be something you want to immerse yourself into. When life throws curve balls, don’t duck.”

For me, radical simplicity is faith in the unseen; the simplicity of “what is right, true and, most of all, alive” in me right now. Turn life’s uh-oh into possibility and promising outcome. Letting go of my firefighter habituation. Radically calling forth riveting surprises to engage a new voice.

Like one of my favorite horses, shaking loose from too much fuss, I was about to step outside for a morning hike. I let the rain nudge me back inside. I asked myself: “Okay, now what? What does my heart most need to hear?” Well I discovered it; The VOICE that rocked my soul. I invite you to listen and be surprised. Lighten your soul and spark your expression!  http://youtu.be/TpaQYSd75Ak Jaw dropping, foot stomping, yes?

THE LADY OR THE TIGER REVISITED

I was inspired in my seventh grade English class by reading The Lady Or The Tiger. That day I decided to become a writer. Not yet the later books, A History of Western Philosophy by Bertrand Russell, Miles Connolly’s, Mr. Blue, Kazantzakis’s Report to Greco, Joan of Arc or Peter Matthiessen’s Snow Leopard rousing me. We are talking myth by Frank R. Stockton.

 

Not only did my emerging writer self present itself then but also the creative path to be an organizational and leadership consultant. My work: empower clients in envisioning desired futures. It is about clients finding themselves smack dab in destiny and then crafting a new story. (By crafting, I mean an authentic, creative engagement with the world such that unprecedented outcomes prevail.) In short, it’s an innovative conversation, thinking outside the proverbial box, discovering possibilities. It's best fired by passion, yet too often it shows up when the house is on fire, as in the case of our myth.

The Lady or the Tiger is a fascinating old school power story spiked with horrific paradigms still stalking our collective future. It is a story of tragic consequence for those moving outside inflexible class boundaries. It is an excellent myth for innovative leaders setting sail for uncharted worlds. Ending paradigms that destroy life are the riveting new narratives of pioneers and remarkable organizations. These are the leaders born of true leadership development. They are the risk-takers, manifesting outrageous futures.

Our old story involves a King doing as he pleases. It is a storyline ready to erupt into bloodshed. (When will the media lose its fascination with this story?) Our world is locked up in these predictable chronicles. What made The Lady or the Tiger so powerful is its conclusion.

I was dumbfounded when our teacher told us to write an end to the story as our assignment. Craft a new story? Remarkable. Astounding. Outrageous. Awesome. Okay, so who comes out from behind the door? The lady or the tiger? Wow. That newly created story is in now in my hands!

Working with companies as well as animal and philanthropic stewards, I still get hooked by old story lines. Who comes out, the lady or the tiger? My clients present ongoing dramas: lack of shared resources, ladies and tigers, kings and princesses still abound. These lineages are rife with violence. Precisely because the lady or the tiger myth still plagues our worldview, imagine my delight when I recently discovered a new twist in the storyline, likely born of daring leadership.

I am not going to tell you the outcome, but you might want to read “The Lady, the Tiger and the German Shepherd,” showcased in Unlikely Loves by Jennifer S. Holland. It is a story with promise for more arresting sequels. We are on the verge of a tipping point where dog eat dog and power games just might take a back seat to love, possibility and team playing.

Your turn: Who comes out, the lady, the tiger or…?

GATEWAY TO THE POSITIVE

                                                                                             Photo-Yose-Bierstadt

It is easy to look around and notice what’s wrong. It takes practice to see what’s right. Positive energy heals, conducts love, and transforms. Choose positive energy.

                                                                                                Melody Beattie

                             

Before sunlight can shine through a window, the blinds must be raised.

                                                                                                 American Proverb

“The reprieve from everything negative that these animals offered me was enormous. I was feeling very apart from nature. I had lost my fascination with people. Being so close to the horses and alpacas was really special.”            

                         Lauren Grabelle, quoted in Unlikely Loves by Jennifer S. Holland

This week got off to a blazing start. When I was in Africa, I fell in love with the Chimfunshi sanctuary and I met amazing people, including beautiful ebony-skinned ones. I wondered if, in my lifetime, Hollywood could embrace this beauty. Imagine my delight when Oscar winner Lupito Nyong’o’s moving speech on black beauty went viral, empowering others to step out of internalized racism and into a new standard of splendor. http://www.news.com.au/entertainment/celebrity-life/lupita-nyongo-delivers-an-incredible-speech-on-beauty-i-prayed-to-god-for-lighter-skin/story-fn907478-1226846866664 

What allows you to move in positive ways? We are in constant transformation. Let me introduce you to Nick Ortner helping us “tap” our way into transcendent tipping points and to Ryan Eliason, whose mission is: “empower 20,000 social entrepreneurs with mindset shifts and tangible business skills needed to make a positive impact in the world.”

When I need a hit of the positive, I dip into nature’s beauty: flowers, rocks, mountain views. When not writing, working, being with animals or engaged in soulful conversations, I occasionally look to what new offers the television industry has.

My criteria: Is it affirmative? Does it model good values? Is it inclusive? Recently, three shows made the grade: “The Fosters”, “Parenthood” and “Switched At Birth”. They feature families honoring diversity and who are lavish with amends. Actors who might be overlooked are celebrated, with no culture or race upstaging the other. Oscar winner Marlee Matlin shares that in "Switched at Birth," she gets to be herself. It is a beautiful new cultural fabric that we are weaving. We have raised the bar.

Not only did Lupito Nyong’o move me to tears, but also my heart leapt up with a client’s watershed breakthrough. As an activist, my client got caught in a breakdown of “us against them.” Old conditioned bias sabotaged her efforts.

Through her leadership development, this client committed to ending her negative speech and angry outbursts. She cast new stones upon the water. No longer muttering, she is making a solid leadership stand for women caught below the poverty line. Aligned with her values, she teaches organizations to do their leadership development work first. Slow down and do your own work.

We toasted her 20-year project completion that celebrates the feminist movement’s positive impact and her philanthropy on behalf of shared wealth. She offered what helped in 2013: “Many things, equine-guided leadership, a horse named Lilly, meditation and moving up the scale.”  http://namasteglobalvision.s3-website-us-east-1.amazonaws.com/NamasteDeclaringNewFuture-3%20copy.pdf 

Isn’t it amazing what can we can accomplish in this new movement to step into the positive?

Lupito Nyong’o

IN THE NAME OF LOVE

Togier Berge Photographer, photo used with permission

In the eyes of the law, the fox kit was out of place, a weed, expendable. To me, his individual life was precious, his death arbitrary.

                                                                                          Priscilla Stuckey

All tremble at violence; all fear death. Putting oneself in the place of another, one should not kill nor cause another to kill.

                                                                                          Buddha

Fragmentation, competition, and reactiveness represent three key aspects of cultural dysfunction, in organizations and society. They are not just isolated behaviors but powerful strategies that have outlived their usefulness.

                                                                                          Peter Senge and Fred Kofman

     

The first quote broke me when I first read it. It broke me the third and the fourth times too. Broke through my sluggishness. Life expendable? Dylan has it right, “the answer is blowing in the wind.”

In Kissed By a Fox, Priscilla Stuckey writes of our western creation story that shaped a rupture in our understanding of the world. It is the separation story of mind split from body and spirit from matter. Tracking Descartes, Plato, Augustine, Malthus and Hobbes, Pricilla brings to light the western confabulated creation story, producing hosts of paradigms: humans steeped in original badness, (and there is nothing we can do about it); animals as unfeeling mechanistic forces; and the belief that if we cut ourselves from our bodily experience, heaven will redeem us. Well, “basta” on that.

History books and the media sirens are rampant with old embedded views, moldy cheese stories. Even the mice don’t want that cheese. Who Moved My Cheese? What I love about paradigms is that untruth can be released. Poof! Goodbye old world-views. Hello life connection!

“In the Andean story,” Priscilla writes, “humans as well as llamas, potatoes, maize, beans, ancestors, rains, and mountains all keep life running smoothly by loving and allowing themselves to be loved.” West African couple, Sobonfu and Malidoma, says that each child is raised knowing they were born to bring a special gift to the village.  Basil, Francis, Thoreau, Butterfly Hill and The Achuar found radiance in connection with our environment, taking stands to protect and honor Father Sun, Sister Moon and Mother Earth. Unlikely Loves written by Jennifer S. Holland chronicles animals who share love between species as they bear their special gifts.

Jennifer writes of Piper of Oklahoma, a Pit Bull, who was first responder in licking rejected baby goat back to life. “Piper and GP (Goat Puppy) were like Mother and Son after Piper revived the little goat that night.” Posed Paws, a group of pet photographers, posted this jewel of love between the species, http://posedpaws.ca/edmonton-pet-photographer/real-life-fox-and-the-hound-best-friends-will-melt-your-heart/. In 2010, the positive news media reported the story of Buddy the German Shepherd, that went viral. Buddy raced to get the lost Alaskan state trooper after Ben Heinrichs let Buddy out of their burning house. Once found, Buddy raced ahead, leading the trooper to the burning house and his family in need.

Martin Buber also got it right. We exist in relatedness. There is the I-Thou relationship. The Wind’s been blowing into a better creation story all along. Many of us are setting sail. The fox kit, indeed ALL life, is not expendable.

Togier Berge, Photographer, used with permission

IT IS ALL ABOUT THE BREATH

There is always Music amongst the trees in the Garden, and our hearts must be very quiet to hear them.   Minnie Aumonier

One beautiful day in gorgeous summer heat, I, on behalf of Namaste Global Vision, find myself driving over new roads to meet Stuart, a newly recommended animal whisperer. Stuart and his apprentice, who has just arrived from England, meet me at the gate. Horses are there to welcome me. In the jeep, I am handled two gifts. A candle from the gardens and a charming camel sun-catcher to hang in my window, which I do.

At the end of the wending road, we arrive at Sacred Camel Gardens. Not since Africa have I felt this peace of animals and humans coming together in one sacred spot where love is the way of greeting each other and the day. Here with Stuart, it is clear that he and the camels are equal souls. He is there to guide and teach, and to serve them. They know it and so does he. The world melts away and my worries disappear. The day unfolds.

Have you ever felt the presence of a camel, that big heart, just allowing your breath and his, with the next moment to come? Walking among these gentle giants, I feel complete serenity. Stuart slowly introduces me to each individual camel who is in the garden near us. He tells me of their stories and canceling travel plans to Australia and family, twice, just to stay by the side of an elder camel statesman, Jingle Baba, in his final years.

Sun pours down, camels' gentle sounds, their big eye engagements, a teenager trying to playfully connect with me. This warm communion of camels and humans. We stay in sanctuary all day until dusk calls me away from this delicious interlude. That day, the moment of connecting more deeply with Hi Ho and all the camels lingers within me. Such wonder I met in 2013. I can't wait to discover what new magic awaits me in 2014. How about you?