THANKSGIVING / A MEAL FULL OF GRACE

I’ve made peace with Thanksgiving. I feel affection for how it became a blessing day of gratitude and sharing.

I had a few issues with Thanksgiving that I needed to transform first. (Family baggage; USA’s Thanksgiving’s historical past and The Turkey.) As a young adult, I never grasped taking a life and then giving thanks over it; so I don’t. While I can’t undo Native American suffering at the hands of Pilgrims, I can bless Native American culture. As for family baggage, it’s meant to be released.

Harvest Festivals from around the world have a common theme: blessing, giving thanks and feasts with loved ones. Embracing other harvests gave me a deeper appreciation of what’s possible.

Onam is a Kerala festival honoring a time of freedom, protection and prosperity.

Thanksgiving in Brazil is about giving thanks to God for the harvest.

Great New Moon Festival is a ceremony of the Cherokee Nation.

Many Native Americans pay respect to Harvest festivals.

Korean Chuseok is a day of thanks and honoring ancestors.    

One of my favorite Thanksgivings was 21 years ago. I invited a niece and nephew, two close friends, their friend, my sister, brother-in-law and their two dogs, to come for a few days to a family vacation home that was my turn to use. We collectively would create the meal. My dog, Nami, offered to do kitchen clean-up.

I’d just unloaded grocery bags. I turned to everyone to discuss how to organize Thanksgiving preparations. Who wanted what?

My friend, Marie, was first to speak. Her question: “Karla, what would you have if you weren’t thinking about what we wanted?”

“Well, interesting question. Because I’m a vegetarian, I’d make things like, uhm: Garlic Mashed Potatoes, Pear Salad, Cranberry Sauce, Yeast Rolls, Mushroom Gravy, Holiday Stuffing, Mashed Yams, Pumpkin Pies. Maybe another pie and a Tofu loaf.”

Marie replied: “Sounds GREAT to me! Let’s have these dishes this Thanksgiving. We don’t need the other stuff.”

Everyone agreed!

My jaw dropped. I invited everyone to co-create Thanksgiving from all our favorite dishes.

“But you guys like that other stuff!”

“Well, this year we don’t,” Marie declared, with all heads nodding. “That’s settled. Let’s make a list.”

Vegetarian Thanksgiving was in progress.

I was blown away by everyone’s generosity. Thanksgiving became about deepening connections and true giving.

Cooking that day was fun. Finally, we sat around a candle-lit table, with ocean views and sounds. We shared gratitude. EVERYONE loved the food! The conversation was warm and plenty, just like our sated bellies.

While everyone else was sitting back from the table, digesting, I watched my sister reaching generously for more food. The rest of us moaned about how much we’d eaten. We all were preparing for an ocean walk. I stopped the conversation.

“Hey, Georgie, what’s up with you? You just ate more food than I’ve seen you eat in your whole lifetime! Normally, you nibble. Are you PREGNANT?”

“Wow, Karla, you’re good. I wasn’t going to tell anyone. But yes, yes, I am,” Georgie said beaming.

My jaw dropped one more time.

And this is how I shared one of the best, happiest and most amazing Thanksgivings of my life.

So, Reader, tell me about a time when you were really happy at Thanksgiving. Who was there and what contributed to your satisfaction?